This is a joke post(DLDL Chapter 1)

I decided to translate DLDL chapter 1, except the quality of translation drops the further you read. This is meant to be a joke, mods pls don’t ban


Holy Spirit Village ,a remarkable name for a less than remarkable place. According to local legend, the village was the birth place of a Spirit Saint. It was a legend that gave pride to the 300 odd villagers living there. 


Large swaths of farmland surrounded the village, and inside the fields are vegetables of all shape and size. Every year, the produce is harvested and presented to the lord in Nodesville in exchange for other essentials. Thus was the life of a peasant. 


At the break of dawn, patches of fish-belly white begun to form in the skies above the eastern front. The sun rose slowly, barely peaking above the horizon’s sight. As shadows turned to light, we see a small figure sitting atop the local hill, calmly surveying the world with his bright blue eyes. 


He was a child of six years old. A wheat-yellow tan covered his skin, a black mess of hair upon his head. His clothes, although plain, are unsullied by dirt or sweat. His eyes stared unblinkingly towards the fish-belly white skies, as he slowly inhaled the essence of the earth. 


Suddenly, he widened his gaze and focused his will just as a faint indigo wisp darted across the edge of the horizon. This was the moment he had been waiting for! His gaze heightened in intensity, concentration peaked to capture even just a glance more of that ethereal glow. 


As the sun rose further, the eastern white mist slowly dissipated to nothing, and the purple wisp was no more.  Only then, does the boy finally relax. He closed his eyes and exhaled. A slight white tinge now coloured his breath. 


A moment later, and the boy’s eyes opened, but this time his iris shone with violet glow. A moment more, and his appearance returned back to normal, as if nothing had ever happened. 


The child sighed deeply, before muttering to himself, “what a shame, it has been three whole months, yet my Magic Sky Powers have yet to break past the first major plateau. Why? My Super Purple Pupil skill is able to improve, yet if My Magic Sky Powers continue on this path, I will not be able to improve my other super cool skills, like my Magic Jade Hands Skill. In my past life, I did not encounter this issue. Is this a problem fundamental to this new world? There are 9 levels of Magic Sky Powers, but I am just a level 1 noob. OTL” 


It has been five long years for dis boi. The last thing he remembered from his past life was him leaping off the cliff in front of his assassin club. But death did not come to his spirit, for the next thing he felt, was warmth enveloping his entire being. That soon changed thereafter, when his consciousness was squeezed through some woman’s birth canal. 


It too a long time before he understood what happened. He did not “die”, yet he was no longer the person he once was. It took nearly a year before he understood the Ching chong tongue spoken in this new world, but scenes from his birth still lingered in his memory. He wasn’t able to open his eyes, yet he heard a murky voice shouting, screaming, pleading with heart-wrench pain. “Don’t leave me Sister no.3, don’t leave me”. That voice belonged to his Father, Tang the Vast. Mother had died in labour.  


Whether it was the will of a God, or a passing coincidence, Tang the Vast named him Tang no.3, Tang III. It was the same name that he had in his past life. 


Tang III’s name stood out even in the village, and the other children made fun of him for that. However Tang III was unfazed. It was a name that he had for nearly 30 years in his past life, and was a source of comfort for him; it was a Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past.


Despite his initial whirlwind of emotions, Tang III grew to accept his new circumstances. In his view, the most precious thing one could get, was the gift of a second chance. Perhaps in this world, life will lead him down a different path. 


Although born into nothing, Tang III’s vast troves of knowledge from the past was a treasure that will keep on giving. As a hyper genius of the Great Assassin Club, he had long memorised the many weaponry blueprints in the club’s possession. His curiosity also led him to firmly engrave within his heart the Super Sky Skillset. Tang III hopes to bring Great Assassin Club to this new world. 


“It is time”, Tang III thought as he gazed upon the sky. He leap up in that petite body of his, and sprinted downhill. With each step his body flies forward, like a cork bobbing atop the rough wavy surface of the hill. Naturally, as a genius member of the Great Assassin Club, he is highly proficient in the use of concealed weaponry, poison, as well as bodily agility.  Poison use is a skill that is taught to outer members of the club, as core members have even more powerful means at their disposal. 

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